The Thanos Initiative

Thanos doesn’t see himself as the ruler of a Universe or a conquering king. He considers himself to be a benevolent, albeit emotionally stunted God of an unthankful mass. Making the hard decisions where no one else can. Killing trillions to, well, save trillions. Hell, he doesn’t seek to bring pain and misery to others. He seeks to stop the pain and misery caused by their continued existence. Guys, Thanos is a good guy. All he wants at the end of the day is to lay back and relax having saved the Universe.

The Conundrum That Is Every Kid’s Party Ever

After years of keeping my cynical side-who likes to be referred to as V-Darth Über- submerged nearly entirely, he escaped earlier today only to find himself at a kid’s birthday party . He willingly and voluntarily returned after a few hours, promising never to emerge again for the foreseeable future.